#1
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Blair Walsh's Right Foot (12 - 3)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Amalgamation of Pete Rozelle and Jerry Rice, Comissioner/WR - SF
BWRF is an enigma, and a 1-to-1 comparison doesn't do him justice. He truly is best described as a combination of Pete Rozelle, arguably the greatest commissioner in all of professional sports history and Jerry Rice, in-arguably the greatest to ever play the sport. My dedication and god-given talents will surely lead both the DDFL and my team to continue success.
This season BWRF was far and away the best in the league, scoring over 121 more points than anyone else in the league. And the fact that he was able to do it while picking Antonio Brown is astounding. |
MVP - Christian McCaffrey, RB
In all ESPN leagues, McCaffrey owners were in the championship nearly half the time. McCaffrey had the 2nd best fantasy season ever, only behind '06 LaDanian Tomlinson's historic year. It wasn't all boom or bust either as McCaffrey only had one game without double-digit points.
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GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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A-
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1st
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1st
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#2
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Team Litvin (9 - 6)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
LeGarrette Blount, RB - TB, NE, PIT, PHI, DET
Did you know that LeGarrette Blount has 3 super bowl rings? Litvin's comp to Blount isn't due to his rage issues and penchant for sucker punches, rather that it is safe to say that Blount has overachieved for his talent level. But with a career Approximate Value similar to Chester Taylor, I am sure that he will be forgotten in 10 years only to pop up in the headlines for pawning his SB rings and then being arrested for trying to steal them back.
Litvin scored less than the league average in points, yet got hot at the end. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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C
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1st
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3rd
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#3
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Baldy and the Beasts (9 - 6)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Brian Urlacher, LB - CHI
Urlacher is on obvious comp, for... reasons. Long before he graced every billboard in Chicago with a raccoon pelt on his head, Urlacher was a great player for the Bears but always was on the third-best team in the division, so it is fitting for our third-place team.
BATB didn't look very hot coming into the season with what seemed like a sub-par draft but really settled into the second spot in the power rankings throughout the season. He scored positively at every position with the exception of the FLEX slot. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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B
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2nd
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8th
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Godwin was stellar in 2019. He was a risky pick as Mike Evan could've easily stolen the show, but it turned out to be that Godwin was the better option of the two. The fact that he was taken AFTER Mike Williams, Robert Woods and Alshon Jeffery makes him one of the highest graded picks in the draft.
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When you pick at the top of the draft you either hit, or you miss big. The expectations for a top 3 picks are very high. Kamara who looked elite last year might have been outplayed by Latavius Murray this season. This year Kamara was less impactful than Miles Sanders.
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#4
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Bradies and Edelman (7 - 8)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
'10 Stevie Johnson, WR - BUF
Stevie Johnson committed one of the worst drops in NFL history in Week 12 Johnson dropped a gimme to win the game against the Steelers. It was one of 5 dropped passes on the day. Stevie then took to twitter to blame and threaten god for letting him drop the ball.
"I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO...,"
BAE also dropped the ball, and I can only assume is also trying to blame supernatural beings for her failings.
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Season Killer - Sony Michel, RB
A common theme of Patriot's RBs and LVP. BAE started Michel weeks 1-9 and was sub-par but unspectacular ranking as the RB17 over that stretch, went back to him in weeks 13-14 and only got 5.3pts total which may have made all the difference in her final position in the league.
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GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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C+
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4th
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9th
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Mahomes was a golden god last season, and was worth a 5th round pick, but when you pick a QB high and he gets injured its a recipe for disaster. Even from a PPG perspective, Mahomes was outplayed by a few QBs who rode the waiver wire at some point in the season.
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#5
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Team Baumgarten (9 - 6)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Andy Dalton as a piece of white bread
For years the "Dalton-line" is the line in which the average-ness of a QB is measured. Somehow this seemed inadequate to describe Baumgarten's season, so we merged Dalton with his natural pairing. White bread isn't bad, but it isn't good or satisfying, similar to Team Baumgarten.
Baumgarten scored below average compared to the rest of the DDFL and didn't have excellent nor terrible production from any one position group outside of K. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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C+
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5th
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6th
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#6
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Team Reding (7 - 8)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Jordan Palmer, QB - WAS, CIN, JAX, CHI, BUF, TEN
Team Reding was the less talented little brother of the league this year. Jordan Palmer was the less talented little brother of Carson Palmer, who bounced around the NFL and Arena League.
Jordan bursts into his family home, "Look Ma! I made the practice squad!" she sighs, glancing at the trophy cabinet with her favorite son's Heisman Trophy, 3 Pro Bowls, and All-Pro honor. "That's nice dear, do you want to make you some chicken nuggets and chocolate milk?" his mother replies. That sad short story sums up Reding's season. Blessed with all the potential but an utter disappointment compared with the other titans of the DDFL. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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B-
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3rd
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7th
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#7
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Team Parks (8 - 7)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Mason Rudolph, QB - PIT
Here is where I usually make a snarky comparison between an NFL player and someone's fantasy football team. But in this case, Rudolph is the literal NFL equivalent to Parks. Parks is just Mason Rudolph's more talented twin brother. A more concussion prone doppelgänger for our beloved co-worker. Let's all collectively agree that Rudolph is just Park's lost adopted twin from here on out.
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GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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F
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10th
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10th
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#8
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Team Lake (4 - 11)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Terrell Suggs' Tooth to Gum Ratio
Now I feel a little guilty about this one, but I can safely say I am not a good enough person to be above making fun of someone's appearance to deal with the fact that they are far more successful and talented than I will ever be.
Lake had talent but looking at is season is just uncomfortable. Lake invested poorly with draft and waiver capital similar to Suggs' genes over-investing in mouthflesh. Lake averaged -11.8 pts net in all his games, and drafting the 2016 all-star team did not work out for him. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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C
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7th
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5th
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#9
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Team Naccache (6 - 9)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
Drunk Bob Irsay, Owner - IND/BAL '72-'97
If you don't know who Bob Irsay is let me set the stage for you. Bob Irsay is your racist step-uncle who shows up to your wedding after an Everclear pre-game and interrupts the ceremony by getting into an altercation with an "uppity" hat rack. He is both an infuriating and sad figure. Still the most hated person in the city of Baltimore for literally sneaking an NFL team out of the city.
Naccache was able to squander the top TWO rated draft picks in the Pats D and Lamar Jackson and finish at the bottom of the DDFL. Now Naccache definitely doesn't have any of the traits that make Irsay so vilified, but his mismanagement of a team with so much talent is both similar to Irsay, infuriating and sad. |
GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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D
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9th
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2nd
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#10
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Team Goff (4 - 11)
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TROPHIES & AWARDS
NFL Equivalent
NFL Twitter Commenter
When I ask myself what is the worst thing about the NFL it is easy to point to Nathan Peterman, poor refereeing, concussions, domestic abuse issues, and Antonio Brown, but nothing is more vile than the denizens who anxiously await the opportunity to share their uninformed "gospel" on Twitter. Such willful savage ignorance is staggering. If I ever need reminding of how Donald Trump was elected and continues to maintain support I just peruse the comments on the latest Adam Shefter tweet to pop the comfortable bubble I live in.
Just like those spiteful denizens of social media, Goff was just the worst this year. He scored 160+ points less than any other team in the league. |
Season Killer - David Johnson, RB
David Johnson's fall was staggering. In weeks 1-7 he was the RB7 and seemed to have returned to form. Goff regretfully continued to put his faith in him despite nagging injuries for weeks 7-11. Over that span, Johnson put up -.8pts. That is right NEGATIVE points. Worst run for a starter you could ever expect.
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GRADE
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RANK
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START RANK
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Season-ending Draft Grade
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D+
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8th
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4th
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